[lethiathan]

Patient: All to often I come across this annoying nag in my brain. frequently lately
Doc: what kind of nag is it
patient: DSM
Doc:???
Patient: these cars, They are well the competition for my beloved little car I own. There is a this feud in this this under ground culture I belong to.
D0C: i see
Patient: It irritates me. It seems like no matter how many articles i read, no matter how many youtube videos i watch. I am conflicted. The STi is supposed to be number one. But these damn cars are so easily tuned with cheap *** ebay parts that... well... they are faster in many ways.
DOC: I am not sure where you are going with this.
Patient: I am angry doc. Angry. It costs thousands of high quality well thought out upgrades that maintain the car as a daily driver and I am trumped by a nineteen year old with a friggin huge as*S turbo that cost him 800 bucks on ebay. Its like you konw...
Doc: No, I don't know
Patient: well how bout this. you buy a big screen tv high quality pay a bit more because it has quality built into it. Then you neighbor goes and buys the other brand for cheaper and it seems to perform better. Get the picture.
Doc: I guess. How does that make you feel?

[pinoygamer26]

lol... random!!!

[OrangeDot3083]

Slightly off topic... but who cares.

Cant wait for part II.

[STI_Mike]

strange and random but funny?

[USNSTI]

If a DSM ever wants to race you, challenge him to the best out of 10 runs. 90% chance he'll break before the fifth run.

Anyway, I hope this is a joke and you aren't really losing sleep over what 19 year olds post on youtube.

[Draco-REX]

DSM vs STI?? Not even the same class. If all you want to do is go fast in a straight line, why bother with either? Get a 5.0 Mustang. You'll slay both for half the cash.

[slwdrvrzsuk]

[t0m0rrow23]

Originally Posted by slwdrvrzsuk

right there with ya lol

[BMX_STI]

Originally Posted by Draco-REX

DSM vs STI?? Not even the same class. If all you want to do is go fast in a straight line, why bother with either? Get a 5.0 Mustang. You'll slay both for half the cash.

This is funny because my buddy has a 92 GSX eclipse with a 60 trim turbo that is faster than my STI. And I also have a 1990 GT 5.0 sitting in my garage. haha

[lethiathan]

Session 2:

Patient: Well doc, I've been thinking...
Doc: About what?
Patient: perhaps there is a magical pill that'll make it go away.
Doc: well there are mild dose drugs we can explore. But, I am still having a hard time understanding why we are having an issue. I frankly can't justify medication until I am convinced you suffer from a neurological disorder that is causing severe discontent in your life. Lets start here... Are you married?
Patient: Yes... but only figuratively.
Doc: confused. what do you mean?
Patient: I like to think of my relationship with my STi more like a relationship with a women. Only, unlike a woman, she requires minor maintenance, she does as she's told, and doesn't complain when I look at other cars. But, I am completely committed to her. So in that sense I am married to my car.
Doc: frustrated by the marry-go-round issue. Look in order to establish a connection between your obsessive complaisance with DSM, I need you to step out of the realm of vehicles and focus on the responses that tell me about who you really are.
Patient: OK doc. I am not married. I want a girlfriend but that would just interfere with my other relationships.
Doc: Ok so you have friends then?
Patient: not really, well... I have online friends in World of Warcraft. I am told they aren't really friends though.
Doc: World of Warcraft?
Patient: yes, It's a Massive Multi-player Online Role Playing Game
Doc: OK. so lets recap you spend your time looking at youtube videos, playing video games, and obsessing about your car. Would you describe this as a normal lifestyle?
Patient: completely.
Doc: Ok. So tell me about your childhood.
Patient: not much to say really... Oh except my mother loved her 1967 Mustang. She told me the only reason she had to get rid of it was because she was having me and my father walked out saying "children are like parasites, they suck the life out of every living thing." He drove a 85 toyota 4runner. She talked about that car a lot I remember.
Doc: trying to assimilate the connection between the patient's complacency and childhood regression, takes off her bi-focals and puts down the note pad.
How does that make you feel?